Mpwapjja

Wicked Little Town

idk

i'm a hardened individual.

i work hard, so hard i lose myself

i've lost myself, again

maybe i should quit...

i just know that i've shot myself in the foot.

Some days are worse than others,

some weeks too,

i'm having 2 horrible weeks.

i was in a car accident

i developed PTSD because of that accident

i had a birthday

i got drunk

I was hungover and skipped class because i was drunk

teachers found out i lied and severely lowered my grade because of it

my car overheated

my car has a blown radiator and a melted motor

a $2500 price tag (used), a $5000+ price tag(new)

i was yelled at, at work yesterday,

then blamed for it

now i'm 2 weeks away from failing my Practicum assignment

for which no one told me about

for which the professor is taking everything personally.

i want to give up

on it all

where is my light?

where can i go?

when is it my turn?

where do I go?

Why?

Why me?

please help

i need something to happen

i've had a horrible 2 weeks, something's got to give.

Back In Black

O yes!

I'm beginning my 3 week of my senior year! AHHHHH

ridiculous..

its been an interesting 2 weeks, i met my new Boss....... ya

she is an interesting person to say the least... the very least...

hopefully it'll get better or i'll have to go Brett Jones on her ass! with the coffee mug and all! YEAH!

haaha

I've met a ton of new people and rekindled relationships with old(but great) friends!

and its awesome that we can all go out to the bars and drink! GET QUITE A BIT!

i'm really excited about this year, it promises to be a goodie (at least from the classes stand point)

USITT is off and running and the first UNI foorball game is this saturday WOOOO! go Panthers!

and we'll be there with the purple and gold, THEATRE SUPPORTS FOOTBALL!

until later

Lullabye (Goodnight, My Angel)

well it has been a crazy couple of months to say the least...

before i return to CF in exactly 3 1/2 hours i'd like to thank the 2 people that have helped me through my time in sioux city

(the next paragraph is to be said in a jewish Brooklyn accent, think Coffee talk and add more jew)

TREY K BLACKBURN! yes i know you dropped th K, i wish you the best of luck in New York! break legs and hearts and make out in the rain already! we've all done it!

thank you again guy, you've been a rock, lets do lunch and consult, or insult... whatever same thing..

(Back to normal, or continue)

Kayla Lamoureux, the jungle book back our freshman year to now HAIR! 21 and drinking.... a lot..

seriously....

i'm sick of taking your drunk ass home! jk

thank you for being there for me during troubling times of crazed directors.

you are my hard place

I've learned a lot this summer, thanks to difficult directors and fathers and actors....

jk

its been a great time, i'm glad i came home one last summer.

thank you

One

i'm here

i'm now

i don't care how

or why

for that matter

but for some reason

i can't let you go

i won;t let you out

of my mind,

because there i remember

you

as you always were,

perfect

just the way you are

nothing can sway

the way

i feel about you,

no one

con convince me

otherwise of our

adoration towards

each other,

i know you

feel

it too.

so please let me

love you

for i'll be here

and now

for you and only you

because that is all i can be

my

love

my

dear

my

sweet

my one

find me again...

The Quest/The Impossible Dream

its been awhile since I've blogged, i feel bad. i recently watched Julie And Julia and i"ve realized that i'm a lot like Julie, i never seem to finish the things that i start. With that new realization in mind, i"ve started to plan out the next couple years of my life, granted they will probably change but i'm okay with that.

things change, as do people.

this has been a very hard summer for me.

school can't come soon enough in my mind, i don;t mean to complain, but! DAMN! where is the LIGHT! ugh.. parents can really make you feel like nothing... its my fault i tried to look at this summer as a good test of my theatre knowledge up to this point and it has been! i've done many great things, i've learned a lot, and i feel ready for next year. but "the best laid plans of mice and men often go astray".

again wrote that 5 days ago, i can't keep up with this.

so HAIR opened last night, and let me just say that it feels so AMAZING when all of your hard work pays off, when everything you've done and everything you've done to make people happy, pays off. we opened and sold out, yes SOLD OUT the 60 seat capacity theatre 20mins before the show started at 8 o"clock. we ended up adding chairs and filled up the theatre to 75 people. we made over a 1,000 dollars at the door a 3rd of what we spent, and we still have 5 shows left. This show in one night made more money in one night than the last show "the Shape Of Things" did in its entire run, (sad, but true, and kinda awesome)

things have gotten better, my father has stopped worrying about the welfare of the theatre now (Because of what he saw last night) and yes (TAKE THAT DAD). HAHA

until next time...

Only One

Broken this fragile thing now

And I can't, I can't pick up the pieces
And I've thrown my words all around
But I can't, I can't give you a reason

I feel so broken up (so broken up)
And I give up (I give up)
I just want to tell you so you know

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, but there's just no one that gets me like you
You are my only, my only one

Made my mistakes, let you down
And I can't, I can't hold on for too long
Ran my whole life in the ground
And I can't, I can't get up when you're gone

And something's breaking up (breaking up)
I feel like giving up (like giving up)
I won't walk out until you know

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, but there's just no one that gets me like you
You are my only my only one

Here I go so dishonestly
Leave a note for you my only one
And I know you can see right through me
So let me go and you will find someone

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, but there's just no one, no one like you
You are my only, my only one
My only one
My only one
My only one
You are my only, my only one

i've been having a tough couple weeks in Sioux City, i can't wait to see you all soon, i miss you all very much.

Us/Run Away With Me

I'd like to dedicate this post to one of my dearest friends, a girl whom i've fought with and walked with and spent a great deal of time with, she loves regina spektor more than i do and i figured that since the title of the post is one of her songs (also featured in the movie 500 Days Of Summer) i thought i should, finally, be nice and pay my immense gratitude for her and what she has done for me...

Thank you so much, you're one of my best friends and i love/miss you...

anyway enough of that mumbo jumbo....HAHA jk

i've been thinking of the great people in my life recently and especially ones that i've gotten to know this summer, my cast. they are great. i really couldn't have asked for a better cast for my first time directing. The great part about it is i've become great friends with them. We've shared obsessions with certain singing Tv shows and going for late night walks!

so thank you to them for being my "friends away from friends" or my new lifelong friends.

so the above reflects the first part of the post...and here's the second.

for a long time now (ever since i could drive) i've just wanted to get away. i want to drive across the nation. i just wanna go! who wants to come?

and if you don't i'll go by myself and start a new blog on my adventures.

i don't think i'm different from early pioneers, i want to drive and see Louisiana, Arizona, North Carolina; i wanna go to Oregon and see the coast and drive to San Fran, and then i wanna drive on old Route 66 from Santa Monica, Ca to Chicago, IL and then drive to Myrtle Beach, SC and see the other coast. off the grid

someday i will, no matter the cost, i have the will.

Like The Wheel

so, i thought about it today, and i haven't cut my hair since September. I was with Rachel, Mel, and Stephy (Ho Face) Wessels, the whole Master Cuts disaster, yes the one where i bought that awesome jacket from Express!!!! Woooo!

Anyway my hair is way long, but idk i like it, i do realize it's mullet-ish, but i believe if you

think it looks like a mullet then it is, so for now i'm going for the whole Count of Monte Cristo thing, or Greek God, we'll see how it works out

its been a pretty blah week, i went on a walk down by the river with a friend and we didn't realize that during the summer months the park down there is MAKE OUT CENTRAL! jeez people, but its cute, love is in the air or is that just the humidity?

i love my dog. she is as dumb as a box of rocks, no not pet rocks, just rocks. Like whenever she sees a person she barks and barks and, yes, barks. call it protection, i call it annoying.... but shes cute my little Bobo, my Cockapoo-terrier!

Another note, The Shape Of Things continues with its second weekend which we're all ready for! we have a wine tasting this Saturday! WOO Drunk! and we have ultimate press! (well as good as Sioux City can offer) so as "The Black Eyed Peas" would say "...Let's Get It Started" HA!

And i'd like to thank Ty for turning me on to my new favorite artist The Tallest Man On Earth

Sway

busy busy busy

i find that recently my life has become busy, difficult, and complicated. the show opens friday, and as of sunday we lost the other director (yes my father) he up and quit because of differences we had. So now i will be running Front of house, as well as lights and sound, i'm not complaining, i just need to vent...

so i typed the above last week....
now i'm updating it.

so the show opened! YAY! finally! it went pretty well, we've already made back all the money we spent, so everything is PROFIT! get some!

Things have been looking up in sioux city, Theatre is saving me, with this show and Hair just on the horizon, i've rediscovered my passion for theatre and how much i do need theatre in my life! i feel invigorated! i really can't wait to get HAIR off the ground!

so yes i do miss everyone at UNI, i hope all is well with everyone of you. the video is for you all

my song in this blog is "SWAY" by Bic Runga

Dream a Little Dream of Me

I don't know what to type...

i had a crazy dream last night, it was like a movie! i was with some friends in a car, topher grace, paul walker and katherine heigl. plus some others. anyway we were driving at night down this dark road near a river and we tried to pass a truck and they swerved and hit us! we lost control of the car and like in a movie flashes went by and we saw a truck in front of us and we hit it, flying in the air and eventually crashing on a suspension bridge.

Random right

But it gets weirder, so i'm fine but in one version of the dream (yes my dream had an alternate ending) paul walker was paralyzed and the "movie" went on with him struggling and the girl i loved ending up with topher grace's character.

in the alternate ending, we're there on the bridge and we go to topher, who body is cut in half, so we toss him over the the bridge into the water. YEAH! WTF. then we go to the girls car and Katherine is fine scraps and bruises, but the girl i love (i don't remember who that was) is dead, and i carry her to the edge begin crying and say "i love you, i've always loved you" and proceed to dump her over the edge...

i think i was actually crying too! like sobbing!

i never thought my dreams had that much affect on a person.

Perfect Situation

Hello all!

so i thought i'd be creative, well not really creative more like stealing, and rename and name my further posts after the songs that really influence my life...

idk thought it'd be fun and fun for you readers as well?

anyway, i had my interview at The Gap today, it went well! except for the fact that i was the only boy and the oldest one there... two girls accompanied me in this process and one was 16 a high school junior and the other was 18 about to enter college. i felt so old!! ugh but what can you do, i can drink in bars, they can't. Take that you high school whores!

HAH

Rehearsal went well tonight, the actors just need to learn their lines but i feel that this directing process has been a good one for me, i've been quite calm and really able to handle everything in a cool, collective matter, weird huh? This makes me even more eager and ready for the fall at UNI! plus, i've restarted my vocal training so i'll be able to sing again which'll be awesome!

but for now i leave this post

"Tell me there's a logic out there / Leading me to better prepare / For the day that something really special might come / Tell me there's some hope for me / I don't wanna be lonely / For the rest of my days on the earth."

Changes

ugh...

so today wasn't that bad of a day, ran errands, ate, and cleaned the theatre. Then, my father and i went to drop some stuff off the The Directors of "Hair" and he begin stepping on my toes and not trusting me and then proceeds to get mad at me when i confront him about it. He's been doing this since i've bee home.

if you don't know the story here it is: my father had a stroke, he and i both agree that he needs to take it easy on his body or it will ape shit on hi again. so i volunteered to come back this summer and help him out with this theater that he started, helping him direct this show and serving as TD, LD, PM, SM, LBO, and Dir Of Marketing, ugh, don't worry its not as bad as it sounds... but ever since i've been home he has been stepping on my toes and accusing me of taking over "HIS" theatre...

no dad i'm not. i'm not. i'm not.

ugh... then downside to being home. but i am helping him with his stuff and appointments so... what can you do?

but i need to look up! the gap is tomorrow! WOOO!

i miss my friends, granted my dog is AWESOME but i would to hold an intelligent (or drunk) conversation with UNI people... like allison, michael, nick, smash, mama kyle, hat attack, sam.........., RAR, hudsey, stephy, and so many others

(btw if i didn't name you I don;t wanna seem like i'm trying to please everyone, get over it)

"Time may change me / But I can't trace time"

Here Comes the Sun

After successfully coercing Allison to start a blog, I guess i should put my money where my mouth is and start one too...

so... its almost been a month since I've been at UNI and I still am unemployed... in that i say F Off Home Depot... bitches..

BUT i do have another interview tomorrow (Thursday) at The Gap! so fun!!! wish me luck!

and finally Theatre.....that crafty mistress of mine.

Its been fun directing! i feel i have a sort of knack for it and i'm learning a lot from directing "The Shape of Things", i've got a great cast and we open next Friday! exciting!

so for now adieu

"Here comes the sun, here comes the sun, and I say it's all right"